Assignment #4: Project Implicit

I know that I skipped Assignment #3, it is 1/2 done in my draft entries, so I am going to complete it later. This week's assignment sounded like fun, however, so I am going to do it first: "Go to the Project Implicit site and choose one of the demonstration tests there. Before beginning the test do a bit of writing about your opinion on the subject of the test you have chosen. Now take the test. What are your results? Is this what you expected? Why or why not? Do you have an urge to retake the test? What do you think that might mean?"

I chose to take the "Sexuality IAT" as this is a pressing issue in society. I am frustrated by those who choose to fear or hate something they do not know such as a person's sexuality. In generalizing that homosexuality is wrong or bad, people show their ignorance about homosexuality. In stating that it is incorrect by the bible, people are incorrect as the bible also describes how one man shall not judge another as God will be the judge. I believe that homosexuality is not a choice nor a lifestyle, but an inherent part of someone. Similar to my blonde hair, my attached earlobes, and whatever else is written in my DNA. Therefore, as this test claims to judge my subconscious, it will be interesting to see how it turns out.

After taking the test, my results are: "Your data suggest a strong automatic preference for Gay People compared to Straight People."

I am actually unsure what that means. I have a strong automatic preference for Gay People. I guess it must mean that I don't like Straight People as much. This result is what I expected, I do not have any adversity to Gay or Straight people, therefore the test results show this. My question becomes, how accurate is this test? I was interrupted while taking it, as I am currently in my office, and I did have to restart from an early point as I was called away. Did this effect my scores? I don't believe it did, as the test was different the second time. It seems to be a random grouping of the same words in order to keep you thinking subconsciously. However, how much of a role does your subconscious play when you are typing quickly? The rules were to push the left or right button as quickly as possible, so that is what I did. I have no idea whether I subconsciously thought about the picture of two brides together and considered at all before I clicked the button for "Gay." Or if I categorized good and bad with Gay and straight as they did in both orders.

I can say I do not have any urge to retake the test. This would mean that I am satisfied with my results. It is interesting, and I believe if my result would have been against gays, my conscience mind would have overridden and wanted to retake.

Assignment #2: The history of weblogs

"Your 2nd assigned blog entry begins by reading the essay on the history of “weblogs”/“blogs” at http://www.mikeanderson.biz/docs/blog.history.htm. How does what Ozawa says about the kind of commentary found in weblogs relate to anything you have ever written before?"

Ozwa's article informs the reader of the history of weblogs. Weblogs have been around since the founding of the internet, they are not a recent addition. Ozawa cites a definition of a weblog by Jorn Barger, Weblog Guru, "A weblog. . . is a webpage where a weblogger. . . 'logs' all the other webpages she finds interesting." This is not what I have traditionally found on "Blogger" sites. More commonly found are what Ozawa refers to as Web Journals, an online, public diary, such as this blog entitled "Hi! It's me!". The author utilizes this format to update the reader (whoever it may be) on the comings and goings of her life. This webjournal, not blog by Jorn Barger's definition, does not contain any links to websites that the author felt a desire to share or comment about. There are other sites that specifically host webjournals, such as Live Journal. This site invites the author to post a journal of their daily comings and goings without incorrectly utilizing the term "weblog" or "blog." I regularly read my friends webjournal entries in order to keep up on the comings and goings of those friends I may have otherwise lost contact with by now. An additional type of "blog," utilizing the term loosely, exists with the author utilizing the blog as a method of artistic expression. One specific example is PostSecret. This blog is an ongoing collection of postcards that have been sent anonymously with people's deepest secret written on them. The blog creator scans the postcards and places them as images on this site. This is not a blog in the sense of a log of websites, nor is it a web journal where the author tracks their day to day happenings. Whether you call it a weblog or webjournal, the use of these online postings show the desire people have to utilize the internet in order to share their thoughts, opinions, or daily life with whoever is willing to listen.

Assignment #1: A mini essay on me

Assignment #1: "Your first weblog posting should tell us something about you. Give us some background on your skills as a writer or a reader. Tell us what you like or dislike. Tell us about your college career, or what you'd wish you'd known before the semester started. Whatever you want to say is fine, but be sure to make it a cohesive whole--a nice "mini"-essay."

To tell about me is a story in and of itself. I am no longer in college, but am swimming in what we call the sea of life. I currently am working on many different projects, the most fun being with a business development team in e-commerce. Currently, the trends in the United States as well as around the world are toward shopping on-line, mainly for convenience. I currently do 90% of my own shopping on-line and love it!

Other interesting things about me include my domestic hobbies, I am currently crocheting a blanket for a friend of mine about to have a baby, embroidering pillows for the baby my brother is about to have, and hand stitching a quilt. These projects and regular baking are the "around the house" types of things I enjoy doing. It sounds as though I will make a wonderful grandmother some day.

I currently enjoy reading; I am in the middle of reading a book called "Destination Success." It is written by a gentleman who works as a Life Coach. I find it interesting to read books that encourage me to take stock of myself, my life, and my career. These types of books allow me to step out of my life, and look it over. They create questions in my mind of where I am in relation to where I would like to be. I have recently laid out goals for myself in the next 5 years and longer, and doing this has caused me to be more focused in my day to day activities.

And there you are -- me in a nutshell. As Austin Powers once said, "No, this is me in a nutshell... Help, I'm in a nutshell! How did I get into this really big nutshell? What kind of nut comes in a shell this size?"

My mother, the teacher

My mother is an english professor at the University of Akron. She utilizes blogging for her students to work on their writing and analytical thinking, and I actually wish that was an assignment in my english classes. Some students do not seem to be interested in the project, however. To test out her assignments, I am going to do them. One at a time, week by week, just like her students... Feel free to comment away!

My new assignment page: http://www3.uakron.edu/english/russ/weblog.html

New Orleans

I am sure many people are thinking about this topic right now. Here are a few of my thoughts, and I have no desire to offend anyone. If you don't like what I say, don't read. Please do not take advantage of my blog to air your anger at my opinion. Comments are fine, just don't tell me I'm mean or bad.

Now with that request in place, here are some things that have been running through my head this week with the disaster along the gulf coast. . .

I watched the news this morning, I have been kind of avoiding watching because the pictures make me sad. I read the paper and listen to the radio, however the images on television, and the people yelling and crying for someone to help them while a television reporter (who has a nice place to sleep and clean clothes and just came down to report) stands there with a camera. It is surreal to watch the footage, you can not believe that it is this close to you. It looks like it is a million miles away, a third world nation.

In reading the paper this morning, I saw a political cartoon that stated "No one debates the De-evolution of Man." The drawing showed man, then monkey, lizard, then a man with a stolen television on his shoulder and a bag of stolen goods in his hand. I chuckled. Then I thought how true that is. When people are in tough times or times of stress, their true forms come out. Do they help one another or do the fire shots at police and rescue personnel? Do they share what they have, even when it is very little, or do they loot jewelery stores?

Rainy Day

Rainy days are fun! I like to take walks in a nice warm spring rain. It is not so fun after, with the wet clothes and wet hair. It's dark today, and the weatherman says that there is an 80% chance I will need an umbrella. It has not rained yet. Just dark.

I remember being little, and when it would rain really hard the drainage ditches along our street would fill up with water and flood out into the street. My siblings and I would run out and play in this water. We would put on swimsuits or whatever and run around in the rain water. One time, a kid down the street had a boat and he was trying to boat in the water.

It seems a little dirty to me now, rain water in a drainage ditch. But when it is rainy, and there are puddles on the sidewalk, I sometimes step in them rather than around them. I always have the urge to splash a bit (like Calvin and Hobbs!) but I refrain because I have to wash my own laundry and muddy clothes are not always fun.

Water

How much water can a person drink in a day?

I like to drink water. Water is good for me. I sometimes wonder how much water you could drink in a day. Gallons? I wonder what would happen if you drank a gallon of water a day. How many people do not even drink 8 ounces of water a day? Are they healthy? Is the reason they are not healthy (if the case is that they are not healthy) because of the water? Should we all drink more? Do I drink enough?

Success

I have spent time thinking of what I want to do, who I want to be and where I want to go. I have come up with my idea of success. . .

I will be successful in life when everything I do is because I want to do it. I will measure my success as when there is no "have to" in my life, but only "choose to."

Now I ask that this not be misunderstood... I am talking about doing things and not talking about selfishness. However, I am picturing sleeping until I want to wake up. Working and volunteering at places because I choose to, not because I need the paycheck or the resume builder. Visiting my family and friends as often as I want (not avoiding visiting because I don't want to) and not worrying about details.

I had this realization while in the restroom at a DC United Soccer game. I realized I enjoy volunteering at those games because I choose to do so. I have no ulterior motive -- not the working towards a position there, not class credit, not money, and I actually look forward to going there. The crabby people do not bother me when I am there, I am able to smile a real smile (not one of those forced kind with the gritted teeth behind) and walk away.

I challenge everyone to determine their definition of success and figure out how to get there. I'm still working on my getting there, but one step at a time.

Chipmunk Nuts

It's funny how you can think you heard something different that what was said or sung. It is common to mis-hear, but why? Is it because we want to hear the different thing? Or is it because the art of speaking clearly has been lost over the centuries (if this art ever existed in anyone other than over dramatic actors). For instance, I have never been able to hear anything different than "never had another wang on my shoe" in a popular song. If you can't live without knowing, the real line is "walking 'round with little wings on my shoes." I know. It's nothing the same. Now how did I come up with the line I hear? It could be psychological, that I wanted to hear about a wang on a shoe. It could be a hearing problem I have or that I don't listen properly. I could blame the singer and state he should enunciate properly.

Arizona

We spent the weekend in Arizona. It was fun. It was hot. It is always good to be home. We got to see the family, fun. We also saw the desert and the mountains. I have to wonder what the area looked like before Phoenix existed. The flat desert with the mountains rising out at random intervals. It must have been beautiful.

Water

I have three thoughts going on about water today:

One: It's hot. How much water do you have to drink to keep yourself alive in heat over 100 degrees Fahrenheit? It has been very warm in DC all week, and the media is advising everyone to stay in air-conditioning and drink lots of water. I don't really know if all that is necessary, people live in intense heat conditions and did so prior to air-conditioning. I really think all you need is the water and light cotton clothing (you know, the breathable stuff). I think the air conditioning just screws with your body because then you think it's all nice when you are inside, but go outside and you are sweating instantly.

Two: My brother and his Blue are having a commitment ceremony this weekend. For the family's part in this ceremony, we are all to bring water from our home. I have never considered our apartment more than a temporary home, so I don't think that would make good commitment water for us to bring. So instead, I had a friend bottle up some water out of Lake Superior and ship it to us. I'm excited that I get to bring such good water to the ceremony!

Three: In relation to two, I was thinking about bringing some D.C. water. I am, however, unsure what the proper DC water to bring would be... out of a drinking fountain on the street? out of a gift shop somewhere? out of the reflecting pool? Can you get arrested for taking water out of the reflecting pool or out of a fountain at a memorial? I know you are not allowed to throw coins, and you are not allowed to deface the memorials.... but can you take water? If so, what type of punishment is there? How high is the fine for stealing reflecting pool water?

Poinsetta

I have a poinsetta in my office that has been there since before christmas. We had a "holiday get together" for the building, and I ended up with a little poinsetta in my office. It's festive.

Well it is now June, and I have watered it regularly, and it is still going. It is getting so big that I think it may need repotting soon. I have it in a sunny window and it is just thriving. I am unsure what to do with it, however. As I understand it, poinsettas are poisonous to pets and I would hate to poison my pets...

I guess it'll stay in my office until I leave, and then what? Move with me to a new company? I could come up with a great story for the poinsetta and why it keeps on living. Change the story as my fancy takes me. Hmmm... not a bad idea.

It's Hot

95 degrees yesterday and 92 for a high today. It's hot. It's summer.

The pool in our apartment complex is open, though, so I'm excited! And I get new pool toys tonight. A squishy ball that looks like a penguin and a wobbly ball. Little things make my day.

"That's it, I Quit!"

What does it take for someone to get to that point. Not everyone likes their job. Mine is only okay. But to quit? It seems so wrong. I have had a long Friday in which I feel like I cannot complete anything. This afternoon it got better, however I still feel underwater. How deep do you have to be to quit, though. Or is it boredom that makes someone leave?

How about other things in life. Should we all be able to quit so easily when things are not going the way we want them to? Maybe we should. Maybe all this responsible, see it through stuff is just nonsense that our parents made up in order to get us to fold the socks or clean our rooms.

What would the world be like if we all didn't do what we don't like doing?

New Blog

I recently started a new blog (about all those bad office things people do-- it makes me feel good at work when I have an outlet) and have been ignoring my thoughts blog. So I have lots of pent up thoughts, of course. I don't know if I'll stick to it, though. Maybe my life is interesting enough. I'm going to add some of that in.

I went home this weekend. Saw the fam. It was fun. I listened to Bridget Jones on CD in the car. How funny that reading (or listening to) a book can influence you. I know it's just a story, created to amuse, but Bridget works to become more confident, poised, etc. and I wonder if I need to do that. I'm not extreme, in that I have not gone out and purchased a library of self help books or taken holday to Thailand and gotten arrested or started counting calories that I eat and obsessing about my weight. In relating to the character, though, I do just that, relate to the character. I am almost done with the book, but to finish (before it is due back to the library of course) I am listening on the way to work. It makes me want to stay in my car and listen when I park. Funny how a book can suck you in.

Microwave Popcorn

I like microwave popcorn. I have a bag (unpopped) sitting on my desk right now. But when can you pop and eat popcorn at work? Is there really time for that during the day?

I could pop it in the morning, just before lunch when my tummy gets hungry. But then I could just wait an hour or so and have lunch... Wait! I could have it for lunch. But it's not so nutritious and maybe that would be a funny lunch... Then in the afternoon. But I don't get hungry in the afternoon until it's almost time to leave. Then it seems pointless to pop a whole bag of popcorn when I'll never be able to eat the whole thing.

I think the answer is that I stop questioning when or needing a reason why. The next time I am sitting at my desk hungry is when I will pop that bag of corn, and eat it, and offer some to anyone around so I don't seem like a popcorn hog. I'm really not, but it is good.

"There's Doughnuts in the Breakroom!"

In office life, this is one thing that can make a good day. Someone brought in doughnuts (cookies, brownies, etc. depending on your office). Today, someone brought in Krispy Kreme mini cake doughnuts. They are good. The only problem is, how many can you eat? I mean, how many is it proper to eat before you are greedy. Remember, they are not your doughnuts... they were brought in for the whole office.

I am reminded of the movie Office Space, and Milton did not get a piece of cake. They told him not to be greedy and he was worried about the cake to people ratio.

Driving to work

Every morning, like most Americans, I have a distance to drive in order to get to work. Most of this drive is on highways and is full of slow moving traffic. Some mornings there are accidents in the way, other mornings just too many people driving in their cars.

Why do we put ourselves through this every day? I just don’t know.

I am slowly becoming immune to the delays, I am gaining patience for the slow going, and planning far enough in advance to get places on time. I am also caring a little less regarding being “on-time.”

However, there is one part of my drive to work that is peaceful. It is the on ramp to the highway. You are wondering – what! Yes, the on-ramp is surrounded by trees. I can not see any other cars when I am driving on it, and it is so green lately with spring. Maybe living in a city is making me miss the woods of the Midwest, but when I drive through this little grove of trees, and all I can see is the one lane ahead of me (before I see the four lane highway packed with cars) I feel like I am driving down a country road in the Midwest. The only car on a peaceful tree lined road.

Maybe it’s silly that this makes me happy, but I like to find bright spots wherever they may hide. And this is one of them.

Bosses who Boss too much

Now how could that be? They are the boss. Well, sometimes they overstep the line and boss about things that aren't even worth their time of day. I think some people need too much control and therefore pick every little thing they can control and force the issue.

Has it ever helped "Suzie Loo" the boss to have a more efficient and effective team if she demands to be called "Mrs. Loo" or "Miss Loo." What about the approach of being called "Mrs. Suzie"-- does that garner her more respect? This all in place of letting her employees call her Suzie, or if she prefers, Susan.

I feel that this type of management only belittles the employees and unless you have an egotistical maniac of an employee, it does no good. Even then, no good. All you do is alienate your employees and make them feel like they are children in your eyes.

So for all the mangers reading my blog (and why are you doing that when you should be working?), pick your battles. Ask your employees to call you Joseph if you don't like the nickname Joey. However, please don't ask that they call you Mr. Joseph. It's just lame.

Somebody's got a case of the Mondays

So when did Monday become such a dreaded day? I know we have all had such a fun weekend and now it is over. Who said that the week is not fun.

I think we worry too much about having the perfect job, that we overlook the jobs we would like to do. Think what the world would be if everyone enjoyed their job. Think that the waitress would smile and wish you a good day. The cashier may say hello first and strike up a cheerful conversation while checking your groceries. Maybe everyone would smile a bit more.

I do wonder, however, if everyone had a job they enjoyed, then who would do all of the jobs. I think in that question I am projecting my distaste for some jobs onto everyone. For instance, I have no desire to clean, but someone may. I also have no desire to cook, but someone loves to.

If we all loved our jobs, would we get cases of the Fridays?